The Best Marriage Advice Ever

My hubby and I have a couple friends who are engaged to be married, and since we have been happily married for almost 18 years we get asked for advice a lot.

Here is the absolute best marriage advice there is....Talk.

More importantly Talk and Listen to each other.

Talk about everything. Kids. Money. Religion. Politics.

Where your kids will go to school if you want kids (public, private or homeschool)? Will one of you stay home with the child/children or will they go to daycare? Will you have separate checking/savings accounts or combine them into one account? Do you both celebrate the same holidays? Do you both share the same views of religion? What about politics - do you share the same ideology?

Anything that is important to you needs to be discussed.

If you can't talk to your potential mate about something or they won't listen or discuss it - then you really should hold off getting married. Get these important issues settled before you tie the knot. This is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. You should be able to tell him/her anything.

Another very important piece of advice is...Don't expect your partner to change.

Accept them the way they are.

If they are an absolute neat freak or continually leave messes everywhere just assume that's they way they will stay. Maybe they are obsessed with sports or she loves to collect scrapbooking supplies. That's who they are. Accept it.

We have seen too many people go into relationships wanting something while their partner didn't. A common problem we see is one wants kids and the other doesn't. Either resign yourself to the fact that kids aren't in your future or move on to someone who more shares your view for the future.

If it's important to you it should be discussed and both partners should agree to a common decision. 

Working out these issues prior to getting married will cut down on some of the main reasons for divorce.

A Photo-A-Day Challenge Can Change Your Life

It may sound simple, but doing a photo-a-day challenge or just taking a photo everyday for a month or year really can change your life.

There are lots of apps out there to help you remember.  My app of choice is Instagram.  You can see my Instagram feed here - user name shavattk.

You don't need to be a professional photographer. You don't even need a fancy camera. I use my phone's camera. It's convenient - I always have it with me. 

Appreciation
You start to appreciate all the beauty in your world when you start looking at life through the lens of a camera. You start to notice all the leaves changing, flowers blooming, kid's smiling, etc.

Memories
After a month, or a year if you are able, you can look back and reminisce about all the memories you have of the past. It will trigger memories that you may have forgotten.

Some ideas include taking a photo of your kids everyday for a year and see how they've grown. Another idea is to take a picture that has to do with a hobby. Many people take photos of crafts, books, gardening, food and basically anything else you can think of.

Improve Your Skills
Of course, after taking a photo every day for some extended amount of time, your photography skills will improve. Practice, practice, practice.

If you are interested in doing a challenge there are lots out there. Basically a challenge is just a list of words or phrases that should be the focus of your photo that day.  For example: "colorful" could be a bowl of various fruits, a rainbow, a brightly colored outfit on a child, etc.

Here are two that I have used in the past.

 TheIdeaRoom.net

 FatMumSlim

I hope your life starts to change for the better. Have fun with the challenge and have a wonderful day!

Happy New Year 2015!

Happy New Year!

I hope 2014 was an awesome year for you and your family and I pray that 2015 will amaze you will all the wonderful things that happens.

I wanted to share with you my word of inspiration this year.  It is focus.

Focus on my family.
Focus on my faith.
Focus on what I want out of life and the steps I need to take to achieve it.
One day at a time.
One moment at a time.

Try to live in the present. Be in the moment. Focus on the good.

Well that is my plan for this new year. What's yours? Feel free to share your plan in the comments. I'd love to hear them.

Dealing with First Day of School Jitters

Now is the time of year for schools across the country to start up for the fall. My kids started back to school this week.

Like many kids, my oldest always gets a bit nervous with new situations. The first day of school, field trips, and family vacations, are really stressful for her.

This year she started ninth grade. Her freshman year of high school. 

It's her 3rd day and she still had a bad case of nerves.  Here are a few things I've tried so far. 

Tour of the School

The Friday before school started we got her class schedule and took a self guided  tour of the school. We found each classroom and met a couple teachers.

Friends on Bus and In Class

Turns out she does have friends in a few classes, at lunch and on the bus. Great for Moral support.

Limited Upperclassmen in Classes

Not that this is controllable, but she doesn't have many upperclassmen in her classes despite being advanced classes.  That is at least a little less intimidating.

Foods/Drinks

We've tried saltine crackers, ginger ale and peppermint hard candy. She really doesn't want to eat for fear of being sick.

She's been this way her whole like and I have to admit she gets it honest. Both myself and her father were the same way.

What are some ways you've help settle your nerves or the nerves of your children?

How Will You Be Remembered?

 

How will you be remembered when you pass away?

Who will attend your funeral? Lots of friends and family? A few close friends?

Last month, I had an uncle pass from cancer and I noticed all the people who attending his viewing and funeral. It really got me thinking.

He was an amazing man that I hardly knew. I knew he was very hard working, smart, family man. But I had no idea he was also was very generous and a lover of cats. I started to wonder. What will people think of me when I pass?

I used to dream of being the next big blogger, like Ree Drummond (The Pioneer Woman) or Heather Armstrong (Dooce.com).  I wanted to have lots of followers. Lots of sponsors paying me to write reviews of their products.

I know it is fine to have goals or dreams, but that wasn't the plan God had for my life.

God taught me not to worry what millions, thousands or even a few hundred people think of me. He wants me to focus on the people in my immediate family and those I come in contact with on a regular basis. 

“Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.”
― Mother Teresa

Don't try to be important to everyone. Be the world to my family.

I don't want a bunch of strangers attending my funeral (many years from now). I want a bunch of people full of fun stories about our adventures together. Laughing and joking around. Celebrating my life and missing me, of course. 

I haven't been posting for a while because I was trying to find my purpose. My reason for living. Trying to find my calling.

The main purpose of my life is to care for, teach and most of all love my family. Help them feel wanted, needed and special. Encourage them. Make our home a safe haven. A welcoming place for family and anyone else who visits.

My hope is that someone out there can learn from my journey, share a few laughs or just brighten your day. 

Till next time.

Home Remedies for a Cold

My hubby and both my daughters have a cold. It's nothing serious, but because of his medical issues he can't take many of the over the counter medications. That is why I've had to research more natural remedies.

Here are a few home remedies I've found online that I hope will help.

I'm not a doctor so, please be sure to run any home remedies by your doctor prior to trying anything new. Try these at your own risk.

Cough
Start off with the old time favorite the hot toddy.  Basically you heat the juice from two lemons and 1/4 cup of honey just to boiling.  Remove from the heat and let it cool a bit then add a shot of whiskey or rum.  Mix a tablespoon into your tea or take it directly - a tablespoon at a time).  Obviously, leave out the alcohol for kids.

Mixing 1/2 teaspoon of honey and apple cider vinegar also works to ease coughing as well.

Vick's Vaporub
This one really works.  Slather on the Vick's onto the soles of your feet, cover with socks at bedtime. Then go to bed. It really does stop the coughing.

Running Nose
Herbal teas are said to help fight a runny nose. Here's a link to a really good one that I want to try out.


Chewing fresh ginger like candy or in tea.  Source

Neti pot - It uses saline to rinse the nasal passages. It really does work - though it takes a little bit to get used to.


Stuff Nose
Vick's Vapor rub on your chest.

Peppermint candies or gum - just like the vicks it's the menthol that unclogs the passages.

Spicy foods - just think back to all the times you ate spicy foods and your nose began to run.


Fever
A cool wash cloth on the forehead helps.

A cup of apple cider vinegar to a warm bath is also said to help. Source

Please feel free to share any of your favorite natural home remedies by leaving a comment below.

Trying to Stay Warm

It was all of 2° F this morning. Talk about cold!!!

A large portion of the United States is experiencing the same type of temperatures today, so I decided to share a few things we are doing to keep warm.

Obviously, if you have a fire place or wood stove - use it. I'm going to talk about things you can do in addition to your normal heat source.

Thermal Curtains
One thing we did shortly after moving into this home was purchase thermal curtains. We bought them from our local Wal-Mart for $24 because we have really crappy windows that let a lot of cold air in. This is a pretty common problem, especially with older homes. The curtains are a pretty inexpensive fix and makes a huge difference in comparison to brand new windows.

When it is cold, day or night, we keep those curtains closed to block out the draft.

Draft Stoppers
Another inexpensive thing I did was make a couple simple draft stoppers. See here how I made them. I put them along the bottom of every external door and many windows.

Blankets
Blankets aren't just for your bed. If you don't have thermal curtains, you can always hang them over your windows to block out the cold. Another option is to lay them at the base of your windows or doors. Anything you can do to stop the cold air from coming in and letting all your heat escape.

Of course, you also want to keep some blankets or quilts for your bed or for covering up with when sitting on the sofa.

Layers
Even while you are home you want to dress in layers. You don't want to crank up your heating system, raising your electric bill and putting a strain on the power grid. Keep your home set at a slightly cool temperature. You should be comfortable in a sweater or sweatshirt - not t-shirt and shorts in the middle of winter.

Keep Busy
I try to keep busy, by cleaning my house or other errands when it's really cold. That way I'm too busy to realize it's cold.

If I must go outside I definitely wear a hat, warm coat, gloves and scarf. I try to cover as much exposed skin as possible. Dress in layers with long underwear, multiple shirts, etc.

One last tip, if you use hand warmers (the little sachets) place them directly in your pocket not directly on the palm of your hands. It will keep your entire hand warm in your pocket and also your hips a little as well. I you need to have your hands free, place the hand warmer on the top of your hand within the glove, not the palm of your hand.

Most importantly, only go outside if you absolutely must. Stay safe. :)

I've Been Hacked - Learn How to Protect Your Phone

Actually my phone was hacked, not me.

On Friday morning, I received a text from a number I didn't recognize. It just read "12", so I deleted it. Then they texted again and it simply read "Mom" which I also deleted. Not a minute later, another text saying "Mom, you okay?".  At that I thought, this just a kid trying to reach their mom and got the wrong number. So...I texted back "wrong number".

That's when all h#ll broke loose.  They texted back some long string of numbers. Then my youngest got a text message from every one of her contacts (luckily it was only 4) and my hubby got a text from one of his contacts.

Somehow this loser got my contacts and who knows what else. I called hubby on our land line and told him to delete all texts from me or his contacts today. Just call the people back don't text them.

Then I called my cell phone service provider, Sprint. After a lot of automated questions, I reached a really nice lady. She told me they couldn't track the person because all the texts were sent from my cell phone number to my cell phone number. Not sure how they do that.

The Sprint rep told me I needed to reset my phone back to factory settings. Which basically deletes everything (photos, contact info, apps, etc.).

So I've learned a couple things that I thought I would share with you all.

Use a Password
If your phone offers this option definitely use it. Make it as random as possible. Use letters, numbers, capitals and symbols if you are able.

Download a Security App
You wouldn't think twice of downloading a security program for your computer, but not everyone puts one on their smart phone. Just like hackers try to get into your computer they also try to access your phone info. Face it, you probably access all the same programs.  Go to your app store on your phone and download Norton or AVG.

Never Checking Banking Info On Your Smart Phone
If you need to know banking info, simply call the phone number on the back of your ATM card. Free Wi-fi locations are not safe and anyone can access all your info if you don't have security for your phone.

Back Up Regularly
If you have precious photos or loads of music on your phone be sure to back that information up regularly. iCloud is nice, but if your phone is hacked that information could be tainted or you may not be able to access it. Every once in a while, back up to computer or flash drive.

Hopefully this helps some of you. It's information I wish I knew ahead of time. Learn from my mistakes before it happens to you.

Busy, Busy, Busy Day

Sorry today's post was so late. It was a crazy busy day for me.

Today was the first day back to school for my kids and back to work for my hubby. I spent the last couple days relaxing with my family, celebrating the holidays and eventually putting away all the holiday decorations.

My normal grocery day falling on New Year's Day, so it got pushed off till today when everyone was gone. I got to shop alone :) Yes that was nice!

Then I had a little bit of time to put the groceries away, straighten up the house and then it was time for the kids to get home.

Time flies!

To top off my wonderfully productive day, Mother Nature decided to let it snow. I LOVE snow!

Correction.  I LOVE snow in moderation. Here in the mid-Atlantic region we don't get a lot of snow normally.  I feel really bad for all those in the Northeast getting hammered by the snow and ice.

So anyways, be sure to check in for lots of freebies on Friday tomorrow.

Meet Little Miss Noel

Please welcome the newest member to our family. Little Miss Noel.

As I mentioned last Wednesday, I'm a sucker for strays.  We never planned to get another pet. We already have 2 medium/large dogs (12 yrs and 9 yrs), and 2 cats (16 yrs and 11 mths). Plus the five of us makes a really full house.

However, this little girl was found out in the snow last week. She came up to my hubby one night, meowing like crazy. He tried to bring her in that first night, but our kids ran to see her and she slipped out the door that was still open a tiny bit.

So we watched out for her a couple days. Feeding her and trying to get her to trust us. There was another cat with her that we thought was her mama.  On Thursday, the weather was supposed to be 15 degrees overnight, so decided they needed to come inside.

I picked up the little one and stuck her in a cat carrier we have and took her inside.  I placed her in a room and we slowly all came and met her while she was in the crate.  That night we kept her in the crate but we put her in our bedroom so she wasn't alone. We didn't want her to roam around the house and interacting with our other pets until we had her checked out by a vet.

We tried to catch the mama cat, to no avail. We managed to get her to come in by bribing her with milk, but she flipped out and just wanted out. We didn't want her running around wild in the house and possibly attacking any of the cats or dogs, so we let her out.  We placed a box with a heated pet blanket outside along with food and water in a sheltered area, so she was out of the elements as much as possible.

The next morning (Friday), I bribed her back in with milk. Then I threw a blanket over her and placed her in the cat carrier. I then took her to Animal Control to be adopted out - she was too wild for us. Turns out she was a previous catch, spay and release, so the kitten wasn't her's. It must have just been her companion. That made me feel a little less guilty by separating them.

I know that they are both going to be warm, fed and cared for. I know that they both deserve a better life than struggling to find a warm place to stay, food to eat and avoiding animals and people that may hurt them.

This little girl has been to the vet, got her first shots, received some deworming meds and will be fixed when she is old enough. She is in really good health and everyone there loved her. She is so cuddly, and will be loved and adored for the rest of her life.

As you can see from the pictures above, she enjoys being near people. She sleeps on anyone and everyone. She is still a little skittish, but is getting better every day.

We named her Noel because we found her around Christmas time. It also sounded like a pretty "girl" name, since all our other pets are boys.

As you can see from the photos below, she looks almost identical to one of our other cats. Both are tuxedo cats and adorable.

I'm sure you will see more of her in the future.

I'm A Sucker for Strays

The kitten looked just like my "Midnight" above.

I was up all night last night worrying about a little kitten.

It started when my hubby got home from work. He showed up with a kitten in his hands. Yep. It even looks exactly like my much older cat (16 years old) though no possible relation.

The little kitten was adorable, but it was scared to death. Hubby had heard it meowing under a neighbor's car. The little thing couldn't be more than a couple weeks old.

When hubby brought it in the house all my kids ran to get a look and scared it even worse. It started to claw to get away and jumped out of his hands and ran out the door that was still cracked a bit.

Well, being an animal lover, I had to make sure it was okay. I asked all my neighbors if the kitten was theirs, but no one claimed it.

We found it hiding under another car down the street - meowing. Then we saw another slightly bigger cat - the mama - we assume.

It was freezing (20 degrees) here in the east and was getting colder by the minute.

My oldest brought some cat food from the house in a small bowl to see if they wanted food. Hoping we could catch them and bring them in overnight to stay warm.

They were starving. They ate all the food in no time at all.

Then the kitten started rubbing up against my hand. It even let me pick it up. I cuddled it a little to warm it up. It was very friendly. I fell for this little kitten fast.

I was enjoying all the cuddling right up until the kitten saw my hubby walking towards us. Then that little kitten jumped right out of my arms and ran across the street. That started the mama cat meowing for her baby and the kitten meowing for it's mama.

Hubby and I tried to get the kitten to come back out but to no avail. We even got other neighbors involved in trying to help keep these cats warm and safe.

I still worried about those adorable little felines freezing or getting eaten by foxes. My imagination wanders.

Then God pointed something out to me. He made those cats and is watching over them. I can put food out for them, but ultimately it's up to Him what their fate will be.

That's when I let the worrying go - I've done all I can. I put out food and a little shelter for them to get out of the elements - it's up to them to eat it/use it.

Unfortunately, I haven't seen them today. I continue to pray for them and leave them in God's capable hands.

My 2013 Christmas Wish List

Okay, so I'm sharing my Christmas List this year. It's all for fun, but I highly recommend everyone getting the first one because it really is a fun game. Check it out!

1. Telestrations the Telephone Game Sketched Out!
My family played this game over my aunt's this Thanksgiving and had a blast. It was good for all ages (as long as they can draw).

2. Per Domino Red
I've found my people. LOL I just recently learned about Filofax Planners and I love them. I was trying for months to find a scrapbook and calendar/planner together to no avail. Then I stumbled on some photos of these. This is my fave binder so far.

3. No Excuses Art Journaling: Making Time for Creativity
This looked like a really fun book to try. It claims to show step by step how to do some mixed media crafts. Looks fun!

4. XPY Sterling Silver and 14k Yellow Gold Diamond Winged Halo Heart Pendant Necklace, 18"
Every girl needs some jewelry.

5. Blue Q Random Crap Junior Treasure Box
I loved many things from this seller "Blue Q" but I really liked that this said it was for "Random Crap". Too cute.

6. iPhone 4 Case
My phone is one of the older model iPhones so I have to look online for fun cases. This one caught my eye. They had boom boxes, cassette tapes, cameras and lots, lots more.

What is one your Christmas list this year?

* Please note the links are affiliate links.

Week of Thankfulness - Day 3

Today I want to say how thankful I am for my hubby, his job and lots and lots of patience.

My hubby decided shortly after we met that he wanted to learn a trade. He was already working for a private company as a plumber's apprentice, but he worked all hours of the day and night and had to carry a beeper on the weekends.  He took a big pay cut to start off in a local union's plumbing apprenticeship school. Little did we know that this one decision would make such a big financial difference in our lives.

Through his apprenticeship he earned small raises each year and when my daughter was born we decided I should stay home to raise her.  Finances have always been tight but we are okay with that. We appreciate everything we have been given.

My hubby and I are very thankful for his current employer. He has worked for many companies over the years, but really lucked out with his current one. They trained him to work in their drafting department when he could no longer work in the field because of medical issues.

I'm also extremely thankful for the lots and lots of patience I was given today.

I'm sure I don't need to remind anyone that tomorrow is Thanksgiving. Well Wednesdays are our usual grocery shopping day and because Thanksgiving is tomorrow all the stores were extremely crowded. Like crazy crowded and I don't do well in crowds.

I'm used to shopping with a bunch of older folks and a few stay at home moms. Today it looked like the Black Friday ads on TV with lines and lines of people. Where did all these people come from???

Anyways, my kids who don't enjoy shopping at all were very good. Not a lot of complaining, bickering or arguing. I was thrilled to say the least.

What are you thankful for?

Week of Thankfulness - Day 1 With Thanksgiving Printable

Since this is Thanksgiving week I decided to make it a week full of thankfulness on the blog.

My kids are off school all week and today was my youngest child's Parent-Teacher Conference, so I wanted to express how thankful I am that my kids attend such wonderful schools.

All my kids have gone to the same elementary school. We love the principal, teachers and staff.  Just last week the principal let the students wrap him up with tissue paper like a mummy and in the past he allowed the students to duct tape him to the wall. He knows the names of almost all the kids and even the most of the families.

The teachers are caring, helpful and go above and beyond to help their students. The reason they can do this is because lots of parents volunteer. Not just in the classroom, but in the office, at the copier, even helping out from home.

If you want a great school for your children - start by helping out. Any little bit of time you can give to help out will help make the school better. Giving just 10 minutes copying papers for a teacher can give them 10 minutes more to spend with the students or plan their classes.

Maybe your child's school is not all that wonderful, but one teacher or staff member is. What matters most is there is a person your child enjoys.

I am thankful that there are wonderful adults to surround my children each day. They help them grow, learn and help them nurture their curiosity.

Enjoy this free printable I created to help you remember all the many things you have to be thankful for.  Click Here

Hundreds of Creative Elf on the Shelf Ideas

Ever since they came out I've always wanted an Elf on the Shelf elf. A little blue eyed boy elf. I've collected links and photos of loads of really fun ideas that my elf could do.

In case you haven't heard a shelf comes to visit your home and reports back to Santa whether your kids are naughty or nice. Sometimes the elf is nice and sometimes he or she is mischievous.

I haven't got one yet, but thought I would share my links with all of you. There are lots of really cute ideas to try. Have fun exploring!

101 Elf On the Shelf Ideas from Blossom Buckhouse
Over 70 More ideas With Photos by Happiest Mom on the Blog
100 Mischievous Elf ideas by Design Dazzle
Sunny In Second Pinterest Board full of ideas
25 Ideas That Take Under 5 Mins. by Over The Big Moon
Some Mischievous Ideas by Rae of Light Photography
51 Creative Ideas from Mommysavers
51 More Creative Ideas from Mommysavers
To find a ton more photos of ideas do a simple search on Pinterest.com for "Elf on the Shelf".

You can purchase your own Elf on the Shelf elf online at Amazon.com*, eBay and at Target stores near you.

Then you will need this to help you choose a name for him or her. It's a free download from ParentPretty.com.


* All links to Amazon within this post are affiliate links.

Simple Memories of the Holidays

I love the period of time between October 31st and January 1st!  The leaves are changing colors and falling on the ground. The smells, the sights, the colors.

I'm not just talking about Christmas. I love the entire time period.

I love the period of time between October 31st and January 1st! The leaves are changing colors and falling on the ground. The smells, the sights, the colors. I love everything about it.

I'm not just talking about Christmas. I'm talking about Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Christmas shopping, yard work, decorating, baking, and more.

Watching the leaves turn red, orange and yellow, then they fall and it's on to raking and jumping into the piles. Finding just the right present for that special someone. Making and wearing the coolest costume to a fun party. Spending hours baking cookies with the kids and taste testing them of course.

My favorite memories of this time aren't really extraordinary. For Halloween I remember my parents dressing me up as an alien. They painted my face and arms green and even turned my red wagon into a really awesome space ship. I even won a prize in our town's costume contest. (The green paint was a bit longer lasting then I hoped, but that's another story all together.)

Thanksgiving reminds me of my grandmom's house and her giving me a special job of making the celery with cream cheese for dinner. It was a little side dish, but one of my favorites. I remember sitting at the kid's table and eating sauerkraut, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes and of course turkey. I can still smell all the delicious food.

My absolute favorite thing about Christmas is sitting on the floor with the Montgomery Ward, Sears and J.C. Penney's catalog. Dreaming of all the toys and making a super long wish list. I don't remember whether I got anything on my list or not, but that didn't really matter. I just have a blast looking through the books and dreaming. I still love browsing through catalogs to this day. Just dreaming.

The holidays, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas or whichever holiday you celebrate, doesn't have to be a extravagant. Simple traditions are the most memorable for me. It really is the little things that mean the most.

If you don't already, start some traditions for your family this season. Again, it doesn't need to be fancy or extravagant. Start small or go big – just get started.

Here are a couple easy ways to create more memorable holidays for your family.

Decorations
I love putting out lots of decorations all season long - mostly older decorations that have been in the family for years. I absolutely always use the decoration, ornaments and artwork that my children created. Each decoration has a history or story. Some are as simple as “I bought this because I thought it was really beautiful” or “This belonged to your grandpop's mommy.”

For Halloween we always carve a pumpkin. The kids and I get our hands deep in the guts of the pumpkin and clean it out (no spoons allowed). Then my hubby carves the design the kids choose. We even save the seeds and plant a few each spring.

Photos
Each year I make sure to take a family photo to document how our family has grown and changed. I love seeing my kids when they were little, but am amazed at how much they've grown. It's easy to document their costumes on Halloween, your Thanksgiving table and decorations and of course Christmas morning. I really enjoy taking a photo of my kids in front of the Christmas tree.

Tree
We always put up a Christmas tree - it didn't matter if it was a big or small, live or artificial one.

We've collected lots of ornaments over the years and most of them are handmade by the children. If your tree is lacking ornaments you can always tie bows on the branches, create photo decorations with construction paper, aluminum foil stars, and the wonderful popcorn garland works well too.

Baking

I love, love, love baking cookies. Ok well, not really the baking, it's more of the eating of cookies I love. Have the kids help cut and decorate the cookies. If you are not interested in baking from scratch simply purchased premixed cookie dough. Just roll it out, cut it, decorate and bake. Make a mess and have fun.

Have fun, spend time with loved ones, create memories. Most importantly, it's not the stuff – it's the people and memories that make the season special.

What Scares You???

Halloween is just days away and many people love to watch scary movies or wear scary costumes. Some people will go to extreme measures to scare themselves, but what really scares you?

Each year my aunt and her family have an annual hide-n-scare party. They invite over their friends after dark, black out all the windows, turn off all lights and play hide and seek. The really scary part is they have all kinds of spooky stuff hidden and out in the open for them to find. Stuff like clowns, dolls (Chucky), bowls of spaghetti noodles (worms) and lots more. Believe me when you can't see where you are going your imagination can run wild. Plus, there are people jumping out at you. To top off the evening they would go for a ride in the back of a hearse through a cemetery.  Crazy right!!!

While that may be fun for some older kids and adults, little kids can get really scared, especially at night. They can have thoughts of the boogie monster under their bed or in their closet, people coming to kidnap them, and even animals wanting to eat them.

Halloween can really scare kids. It's not all trick or treating and candy. Some kids are frightened of people in costume and masks.

Here are some ways I've helped my kids get over their fears of Halloween and other scary stuff in life.

1. Have my kids try on dress ups, costumes, hats and masks.
This worked for my kids, but obviously won't work for everyone. My kids learned that they can dress up in a costume and soon it clicked that it's not really a monster walking around. There is just another person inside that costume.

My oldest decided she wanted to be the Staypuff Marshmallow Man last year for Halloween and she noticed it made the little kids afraid. To help them she would casually slip her hood off when she noticed they were afraid and sometimes say "Hi".

2. Put a small lock on the outside of the closet door.
My son was really afraid of a monster in his closet. After nights and nights of checking the closet and showing him that there wasn't anything unusual in there, I decided I was going to put a small lock on the outside of the door. The lock was similar to the type on public restrooms. It allowed him to make sure nothing could get out of the closet and get him.

3. Remove the bed skirt.
For that short period of time when they are nervous about something under their bed I would remove the bed skirt. Then they could clearly see underneath. We also stored toys under the bed in boxes, so they actually associated under the bed with fun and toys. You could also run a small rope light under the bed just to brighten it up showing them that there aren't any monsters hiding there.

4. Limit the scary images.
This is obvious but I don't them to watch scary movies. If my hubby wants to watch something scary I take the kids to play in another room, he watches it in another room or after the kids are in bed for the night.

Feel free to share the ways you help you kids with their fears.

Help Give A Wonderful Boy a Forever Home

I don't usually do this type of thing, but I really felt I wanted to share this.

I've been following this story for a while now and they've reached a point where I feel they need all the help they can get - FAST.

Christine Steendahl from The Menu Mom.com and her family hosted a boy named Igor. Igor is a 15 year old orphan from the Ukraine. They have been in the adoption process for months and need helping making Igor a permanent part of their family.

Let's face it most kids his age have a very hard time becoming adopted. Most families are looking to adopt young kids or babies.

This wonderful family has already had the pleasure of sharing their home with him multiple times. They've gotten to know him and have grown to really care for him.

In order to help bring this family together they need your help. If you can donate $20, $10, $5 or even $1 that is fantastic. Every little bit helps!


If you can't donate money that's okay too. Please share their story on Facebook or with your friends to help spread the word, so their story could reach someone who is able to help. 

Another way to help is to purchase something from her online store, her Amazon affiliate link or to promote the links to get others to buy.

They need to raise a little over $12000 before mid-December this year to cover the costs of the traveling, paperwork, and other fees to adopt Igor.

Please help, please share. Please do the best you can to help bring this family together. Thanks!


Here is the direct link to their adoption fundraising site:
http://www.youcaring.com/adoption-fundraiser/bringing-igor-home-forever/39937

6 Ways You Can Help Keep Your Marriage Strong

After being married a few years, it becomes easy to fall into a routine. Life can become mundane and relationships can lose that spark.

Let's face it all relationships take work, but to keep your marriage strong and healthy it's all about the little things. Here are 6 easy ways to help keep your marriage strong.

Flirt
Don't assume flirting is only for the young. Who honestly doesn't want to feel special, loved, and wanted by their significant other. A small bouquet of flowers, some time cuddling on the couch or just hold hands while walking in public are all small, but easy ways to show you care.

Date Nights
Plan time out alone with your partner. Find something both of you can enjoy. Going for a walk in the park, seeing a movie, watching a sporting event, or just sharing a nice meal are all ways to create memories together.

Bring Something to the Relationship
It's easy for parents get so wrapped up in caring for the kids that they forget about themselves. Both people need to bring something to the table. Be an individual, have your own interests, hobbies, etc.

This is important because it gives you something for you to talk about. It's something for you to get excited over. If you have a dull life you won't have anything to talk about.

Talk/Listen
This is so important. Learn to talk and listen to your spouse. Both people in the relationship need to be able to say whatever they feel without condemnation. They may not always agree with each other, but they will at least know they have been heard. Share your true feelings, opinions, wishes, dreams, cares and worries with each other.

Share Goals With Each Other
One way to strengthen your marriage is to work together to achieve a common goal.  Share your individual goals with each other and as a couple set some family goals too. Working together makes them that much easier to achieve. However, to keep the marriage strong both partners need to feel they are working toward their life goals. It cannot be one sided.

Forgive/Be Accepting
Remember we are all human. No one is perfect. We all make mistakes. Learn to forgive and acknowledge that everyone is a work in progress. Shift your focus to all the things your spouse does right.

Marriage takes work from both partners. Start by flirting, listening, sharing your feelings, wishes and dreams, and accepting your spouse where they are in life. Start small and over time you will see your marriage grow stronger. Enjoy life and make memories together.

Being Thankful for the Little Things

Sometimes it can be so easy to see all the problems in the world. That's when you need to sit down and make a list of all the things you have to be thankful for. Even the little things.

So today is a list of just a few of the things I'm thankful for.

1. My husband's job 
2. Being able to be a stay at home mom
3. An audio version of the Bible on my phone - to listen to any time I want
4. Music to dance to
5. Music to sing along with
6. The smell of fresh cut grass
7. Pizza and a movie with my family
8. A beautiful flower
9. A library close to my house full of FRE*E books to read.
10. Clothes to wear
11. A roof over my head
12. Soft blankets to keep me warm
13. Good teeth
14. Chocolate!
15. A new notebook
16. A great pen
17. McDonald's with my family
18. Stickers from my kids' test papers - I collect them
19. Running water
20. Family that lives near by
21. Watching my kitten sleep
22.  A hospital within 15 minutes of my home
23. Snow cones with my kids on a hot summer day
24. Great teachers and principals at my kids schools
25. Food to eat
26. Access to the internet
27. Access to a television
28. Kissing my kids goodnight
29. My youngest still holding my hand
30. Random hugs
31. Kiss from my hubby when he leaves for work
32. Cold sheets in the summer
33. Drawings my kids create for me
34. My dogs barking when a stranger comes near the house
35. Chinese food on special occasions
36. Little birds that let me know I haven't put food out yet and they are hungry
37. Leaves turning beautiful shades of red, orange and yellow.
38. Hot chocolate after a day of playing in the snow
39. Baby clothes - they are sooo tiny
40. Watching a plant grow from seed to exciting harvest

What are you most thankful for?