Thursday, May 09, 2013

Stop Being a Perfectionist Mom

As moms, we want the best for our family. We want them to have a nice place to live, good health, a top notch education, clean clothes to wear, and good food to eat.

These are wonderful things to want for your family.

However, sometimes those goals are unobtainable. At least to the degree we may want them.

Let's face it we can't all live a "Leave it to Beaver" life and we aren't all Martha Stewart.

Sometimes we let our idealistic views or unrealistic expectations get in the way of us having a happy, enjoyable life.

I know I personally really need a clean house to feel relaxed, but this rarely happens when you have 3 kids, 2 dogs, and 2 cats. That's a lot of pet hair, toys, clothes, and basically "stuff".

When there are unrealistic expectations put on a family it can create a stressful environment. That's the last thing you need for your family. You want a happy, healthy, enjoyable life. Not Stress.

Here is how you can try to relieve the stress and create a more relaxing and joyful home.

Lower Your Expectations
I'm not saying do a complete "180", just lower your expectations a notch or two. No one is going to be able to do things exactly the way you want. Small children normally won't be able to make a bed with hospital corners perfectly, in general teenagers have a hard time waking up early, and sometimes parents rush out of the house in the morning and forget to put their dishes in the sink. If you want a task done a certain way - you may need to do it yourself.  Otherwise you need to accept that person's best at the time.

Things Happen
Understand that mistakes happen, plans change and things don't always go your way. No matter how well you plan something unexpected can happen. The key is to try to go with the flow. Reevaluate when you need to. I call them restart points. When something happens that I hadn't planned on I create a new start point. I ask myself "Okay, what do I want to happen from here?" and I can continue on with the previous plans or make new ones.

Do YOUR Best
So what if your home isn't the most immaculate house on the block - strive to keep your home picked up. Do a little at a time and focus on organization and cleanliness. So what if your kid has on a pair of pants that are 1/2" too short -  roll them up higher or add a trim to the bottom and start a new fashion trend. So what if you family eats fast food a couple nights a week - if that's all you have the energy to do - try to focus on healthy choices or possibly do batch cooking on the weekend.

Do the best you can do! Don't compare yourself to others.
Everyone one of us is born an original - don't die a copy.

I always try to remember that people are like snowflakes - everyone is different. No two are exactly identical.

Not everyone is born with the same talents, abilities or gifts. Be an original. Do YOUR personal best and encourage others to do the same.

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